bleeding.jpeg

Bleeding Out Slow

CALIFORNIA SKIN

I got a girl with dandelion eyes
Every time she blinks it sends us flying
Me and my girl got a different sense of time
She's the only thing that makes me scared to die

I got a girl with California skin
The way she breathes reminds me of the ocean
I got a girl who makes me want to sin
I'm quick to anger, she's quicker to forgive

Santa Monica, and that pacific highway west
Every curve and every word in her pretty little head
The redwood forest in her eyes a beauty so complex
The coastal hues of those baby blues that never quite find rest

I got a girl who's seen a lot of pain
I know that god will give and god will take
But lord if you could please don't let her go away
She's the only thing that makes me want to pray

 

CRESCENT CITY

When I'm in the city she's back at home and I know
Though the lights are so pretty, and the warm fire glows, the letters I wrote
Make her feel alone, like feather to stone when all she needs is some flesh and bone
Let's drive to the coast, and buy different clothes
We'll just wander aimless down the street and hold each other close

Inside the crescent moon, where starlight starts to bloom and you feel it
If love's the final wound, we're heading for the tomb again
A beautiful end

While she's in the mountain, I'm back at home and I know
There isn't a sound, there isn't a tone I could use on the phone
To make her less alone, like feather to stone when all she needs is some flesh and bone
Let's move back to Rome, leave all we know
We'll just wander aimless down the street and hold each other close

Inside the crescent moon, where starlight starts to bloom and you feel it
If love's the final wound, we're heading for the tomb again
A beautiful end

 

NARCOTICS 

Kissing her feels like a chore
But when we're not I get the sense that she'd bored
Is this what our bodies are for? 
I'm too cold to keep anyone warm
She couldn't hold me close enough

Cause when we're making love I feel lonelier
When she's crying "sorry" I'm angrier
This beautiful world is a big fucking blur
Of hurting and getting hurt

Kissing her feels like a sin
And I've been so quick to forgive
But if god is a bottomless pit
Grace just excuses our shit
She couldn't hold me long enough


Cause when we're making love I feel lonelier
When she's crying "sorry" I'm angrier
This beautiful world is a big fucking blur
Of hurting and getting hurt

When she calls me "patience" I want to rush
The preacher says "gentle", I want to cuss
All these narcotics I can't feel a buzz
Every damn thing that I love, is just something I'll have to give up

 

BLEEDING OUT SLOW

i don't really care about heR pretty blue eyes and long, blonde hair
her smile and the summer seA, swept the summer out from under me
inside my chest right where my heart onCe bled her name there's nothing there
she said I made her lonely and togetHer I was half the man i could be
if i'm honest with myself i don't undErstand

the pain of Love
the empty hole
that's left when someone suddenly decides to go
the tears don't come
the silence groans
like every word unsaid is a wounded animal
and it bleeds out slow

i can't really tell if i miss her or just the way her fingers felt
her quiet words october breeze, breathed that frigid winter into me
inside my head right where my brain once dreamt of her there's someone else
she told me she was sorry and she prayed to god i'd understand
but if god is just a cop-out i don't think i'm interested

the pain of Love
the empty hole
that's left when someone suddenly decides to go
the tears don't come
the silence groans
like every word unsaid is a wounded animal
and it bleeds out slow

i'll build a wall so tall
that can keep all my feelings in, and keep you out

 

POSTCARD FROM ROME

She's in a window seat sitting alone
Her suitcase is spilling out untaken photos
Of European architecture, an apartment on the coast
She's on an airplane heading to Rome
She's on an airplane sitting alone

So baby be safe, baby be smart
The world's not so pretty a place after dark
Honey I'd hold you so tight in my arms
But you're oceans away, and I'm home working hard
So baby be safe, baby be smart

Take pictures of people and pictures of trees
Try every corner coffee shop on every busy street
Be the modern Napoleon take all of Italy
But every so often think a little of me
I'm probably wide awake worried bout you out on the street

So baby go free, and baby have fun
The world is a beautiful place when you're young
I'll be here waiting when your wandering's done
If you promise me that we'll still be in love
Baby go free, baby have fun

She's in a window seat sitting alone
Her heart is heavy; her suitcase is full
Of different culture and brand new friends
A postcard from Rome
She's in a window seat crying alone
She's in a window seat heading back home

So baby I'm sorry, baby I'm sure
The world was a wonderful place where you were
You wish you'd stayed longer the trip was a blur
When your homesick for elsewhere let me be the cure
I need you my love, I need you my friend
So you're taking me with you when you leave here again

 

DRIFTER (IN LOVING MEMORY)

I miss you so god-damn much. 

With every wave a little more
The ocean tirelessly swallows up the shore
When you head out on your own
Like the wind circles the world keep coming home

Like a star across the sky
As a forest swiftly kindled by a fire
Hear the thunder as it comes and goes
Like the passing of a storm

Keep coming home, no matter where life takes you
If you throw everything you have to chance
Please know, we are all waiting for your return
Oh, Drifter

Like a train that's heading west
Through those plains and cities never stop unless
You grow weary, though heaven knows you wont
When you hear the whistle blow, keep coming home

And when you reach the golden coast
You taste the salty air, and feel your soul
Like a cancer that's hollowing your bones
When your wandering takes its toll

Keep coming home, no matter where life takes you
If you throw everything you have to chance
Please know, we are all waiting for your return
Oh, Drifter

My dear brother please don't cry
When death takes you like a deer in the headlights
When there's no fields left to roam
You regret the life you chose

Keep coming home, no matter where life takes you
If you throw everything you have to chance
Please know, we are all waiting for your return
Oh, Drifter

// Fill your mouth with rocks when you are talking to the ocean
Paint a redwood ring around the moon
Every tiny star, to somewhere else is an explosion
You're crying in your oldest brother's room

I'm so sorry honey that when you needed me to pray
I couldn't find the words to say it's just that I don't think he's up there listening

Flowers fill your mind when you are bending over backwards
Trying to collect a skipping stone
Every passing stranger has some love that they are after
Sometimes I only feel that love when I'm alone

God now if you're up there, why did his heart stop for no reason? 
Couldn't you have stopped the bleeding? 
If we're all just being used, what's the point of still believing? //
 

DRIFTER II

You missed so much while you were gone
The leaves have changed, and so have I
While you were singing strangers songs
The world kept spinning softly by

Your baby sister turned eighteen
She'll pack her things and move away
The dog got shaky in the knees
Soon I'll join him in the grave

Cause time it stops for no man
So be careful where you go
Love as well as you can
While you still have somewhere to call your home

I think about her on the road
And say "it's fine when it's just me"
They were so kind over in Oklahoma
I could have stayed in New Orleans

She'll be hanging out with friends
I'm in a hotel room alone
Tomorrow there's another wedding
We'll talk right after on the phone
And she'll say

Time it stops for no man
So be careful what you do
Love as well as you can
While you still have somebody loving you

If you find that the golden shore
That you've been aiming your whole life toward
Is darker than you'd expected
If you grow tired of all your running
Drifter please return to us and
Settle down, settle in

Cause time it stops for no man
So be careful where you roam
Love as well as you can
While you still have someone to call you home
 

COLLAPSE

Everything keeps drifting further
As existence folds its edges away
We're just floating in space
More lost and alone with each orbit we make

The stars will keep exploding
If people keep on noticing
They will burn themselves out
Dying for lovers, they will fall to the ground

What if nothing really matters?
We could count the rings of saturn
Life is still a black hole
More undiscovered, with each new thing that we know

Everyone keeps drifting further
All existence hinges on a perhaps
And the sun will collapse
All that we know will someday just slip through the cracks

 

MACARONI SONG

I've got a hundred dollars and a mattress on the floor
I could make you macaroni we could eat it on the porch
I'll play you a song on a guitar I can't afford
I'll be with you for better, I'll be with you for poor

Cause baby I really want to take care of you
I know you didn't ask me to
And you've got everything you need
Tell me what's a bunch of money really gonna do
I'd love you under any roof
And we'd have everything
If You could have some diamonds and a mansion on the beach
Marry some lawyer with perfect hair and teeth
You could do better mathematically
You can buy what makes you happy, but you'll be happier with me


Cause baby I really want to take care of you
I know you didn't ask me to
And you've got everything you need
Tell me what's a bunch of money really gonna do
I'd love you under any roof
And we'd have everything
 

 

I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE

If you ever here this song

Don't bother writing me I'm gone
Over mountains far away, is where I'm sure I'm gonna stay
Never giving you a first or second thought
Tell your parents what you want

Let them know I've hated god
Over mountains far away, I'll never let you let me change
Vulgar as I am you're wrong
Every time I hear your name

You consume me with such gentle shame
Over mountains where I'm safe, from your kisses from your blame
Understand me when I say

After months without a call
Now you say it's not my fault
You protect your pretty face, from the world and from me
Maybe I'm just glad you're gone
Over mountains far away, I'll never let you let me change
Really I'm just scared that I'd become
Everything you said you'd want

[I don't love you anymore, and maybe I just never did]

 

ALIVE

We could drive to the beach
Park your car by the sea
We could dive to the deep
Where the jellyfish sing, and they'll sing

I'm alive

We could park underneath
The branches of a redwood tree
Dance to a woodpecker beat
Hum along with the birds and the bees, and they'll sing

I'm Alive

We could fly to the moon
Mars and jupiter too
The rings of saturn in view
We'll hum an alien tune, and it'll go

We're alive


MONTAUK

 

When the fog lifted, we saw the snow and ice
Our boat started rocking in the waves, on toward the light
My baby took my hand she said "I'm too young, and I'm too scared to die"
But baby, that's why I brought you all this way, see I'm afraid of life

So I wrapped her arms and legs
With the anchor and the chain
And I threw her in the bay
I turned and sailed away
I felt nothing as she sank